BIRTHDAY SEX

so my birthday is sunday coming as EVERYONE of my "real" peoples should know.

any who I remixed the song Birthday Sex by Jeremih.

The quality sucks, I am just starting this mixing thing and I'm not all that great.

But you get the point shoot.

[=

here are the words if you may want to sing along. [= even though Birthday Sex is already a known song the shit still haves to be copyright because I WRITE MY OWN SHIT.
It's my birthday so u know i'm going all out
from the crib to the club back to your house
hit the blunt watch exotic seep out
feels so good but now i'm tryna feel your mouth

up with passion
(lick all around it)
your head i'm grabbing
(my button u found it)
i flip and bend over
(baby please impound it)
i'm telling you where i want my gift

Damn, you know I I I
Damn, you know I I I
I been fiend'n, from the way u keep me creaming
I want your body

Damn, you know I I I
Damn, you know I I I
Your dick is my candle
Lick my icing from all around you

It's time for my
Birthday Sex
Birthday Sex
Give me my
Birthday Sex
Birthday Sex

When I came through
You already knew what was up
Opened the trench coat
Lingerie got you stuck
Bit on your neck feel all on your stomach
Baby Lets Make Love

We grinding with passion
(My body's twerking)
I love your sex lashing
(pound it till I'm jerking)
When you get all up in it
(Pound it till I'm squirting)
My gift's how you're hittin' it

It's time for round 3
So baby lets hop into the shower
It'll be 10 nuts for me
And baby I'm not tired

We gettin' it in
(slam into over time)
Let me show u how i bend
(get yours I got mines)
Push all on you i want you deeper
(do the freaky things I like)
I know my sex is off the meter

Heroin -
5.10.09

Very Strong Women You Are
From first birth I left you a scar
and you held me knowing that I meant you no harm
You loved me even though I hurt you
You protected me with virtue
I am so blessed to have known you
To have shared the same air
Life would be so unfair with out you here
I wish I could correct every time I messed up and you had to tap me
I knew I was wrong but I still did it to test thee
To test and see if you were watching me
So that I could believe you cared completely
Whether I made the wrong choice or the right one
You accepted me when I told you about the kids that poked fun
You pushed me out of crawling and taught me how to run
You challenged me every time I gave up
Took the bottle away and gave me a cup
and I am unconditionally grateful
I thank you for keeping it real and not always being so graceful
My gratitude goes out to you my irreplaceable
MOTHER

Last Night I went to the Dox with one of my besties Ada.
Both of us were tired as hell and i wanted to smoke
but she doesn't know that I still smoke so I had to get her
to take a nap in my bed (that she took it upon her self to lay in, in the first place)
while I went down in my basement to hit the L.
Her ass would not stop talking to me so i could leave.
Don't you hate when people are so sleepy they can barely keep their
eyes open and they talk to you with their eyes half dead?
That shit is scary. I said, "Ada what the hell are you talking about
and who are you looking at because it's not me."
She was talking to me like she was a drunk saying, "I am talk'n to you what are you talk'n about. Where you going come lay HERE!"
Then she haves this strong accent because she's from Africa, so it's
all really a funny experience. But my whole thing is she always
wants to sleep in my bed when i have another room
that has a bed that she could sleep in but she haves to lay up in mines
and then she wants me to lay in it with her so she can talk me to death.

So when i finally get her to shut up I go downstairs to do me
and I'm praying she doesn't want me to drive to the club because it's just
going to be all just too much for my mind. She's one of those besties
that you don't tell everything too because you know she doesn't approve of it
and she looks down on pretty much everything that she doesn't believe you should do.
So me being high and having to pretend that I'm not and then me driving us all the way out Baltimore would be a crazy combination.

While I'm smoking I feel like I'm married, like damn i hope
she don't come down here and catch me because that would just blow my shit!
She probably would nag to me about how much I'm hurting my self
and then she would act all nonchalant about it like she didn't care
since I wouldn't pay her any attention but all the while she would care
because she would have an attitude.

Any way Long story short. We made it to the club because she drove;
we bumped Kari Hilson CD the way there (that's my shit). By the time we got there
it was 12 something and we left at like 3:30 am. I drove back, by the time we were ready to leave my high had gone down and we bumped Kari on the way back down the road. I had a good time but not as much as I had when i went with Ty (other bestie).
She's down for a good time when we go out it's a whole different adventure.
Ada didn't do much but push men off of her that wanted to dance lol which is what we always do.

I'm just doing a bunch of rambling about my night
this blog really isn't of too much importance.

The highlight of my night was when the DJ put on Lil Wayne - Sky Is the Limit
and pointed to me like -this one's for you
[=
bow chica wha wha

FRIDAY!

I tested it on Relly & I lol and these children look trippen. So if we ever have kids you all know it will be two bad ass boys coming first. You can adjust the child to look more like you or the other person or you can put the curser some where in the middle so it'll take traits of you both. [= Here's what happened with mines!

You want to try?
http://www.vw.com/vwhype/babymaker/en/us/

I know you coons will put pictures of celebs or ppl you never plan on meeting
but go head and have fun making your fifty/eleven kids. You can use me if you want since i make such cute babies ^_^.

Anonymous: i got my arm cut up again; how u been doe
Heroin: u got it cut?
Anonymous: no
Heroin: or u cut your self?
Anonymous: i cut it
Heroin: oh u said u got it cut up again, like it was an accident
Anonymous: naw i took a razor and yea
Anonymous: sooo… hows life
Heroin: i'm concerned; u need some attention?
Anonymous: yea u gone give me some?
Heroin: life is the best i can make of it right now
Anonymous: naw i know why i did what i did
Heroin: sure if that's what it takes for you to stop threatening your life
Heroin: oh; okey dokey then.
Anonymous: i do love ur attention when i get it doe
Heroin: little man in your head made you a promise if u did it?
Anonymous: naw I’ve been having some rough months. Going through some things. u know? And cutting… that’s a way of taking that pain/hurt, and other feelings away just for a lil while. It brings me back down to reality
Heroin: really? You don't feel any of the pain when u cut your self ehh?
Anonymous: don’t threaten
Heroin: i feel pain during tattoos so my body must be really on some wrong path shit
Anonymous: lol i have a VERY high pain tolerance, matta of fact i got like 4 on my mind right now to get
Heroin: so I’m saying... when u cut your self, you bleed, you're sore, but now u have to worry about your arm instead of all the pressure that life has brought to you? so instead you... cut... to deal with a pain you can bandage up quickly? but that also leaves an external scar
Heroin: you want to cut your self in four different places?
Heroin: their all alined?
Anonymous: umm u know right above the wrist? lines on the top part all in a row
Heroin: I’m saying you got some artistic body sculpting shit going on? trying to decorate your death?
Anonymous: lol, im alot of things but im too coward to actually attempt to kill myself
Heroin: too coward? no u are CRAZY. man the ppl that think i'm crazy would be blown away if they knew you. how the hell are you too coward to press down if you are not too coward cut your wrist
Heroin: smh. whew girl u just made me need another blunt.
Anonymous: lol, im not crazy, far from it. if anything i straddle that line between crazy and sane; and these last cuts are superficial
Heroin: can i anonymous blog this?
Anonymous: yea sure go ahead
Heroin: this has shook'n my mind up
Anonymous: how it shook ur mind?
Anonymous: love u too ndya
Heroin: i love you too man; u still crazy tho
Anonymous: lol aye since ur high gimmie some tatt ideas
Heroin: where u getting it?
Anonymous: oddly enough; wrist. I’m thinking imma do pain is love around my left wrist, and then love is pain on my right wrist then on the inside its gonna be my capricorn symbol with some stars
Heroin: b/c that's the one that u don't cut on, or that will stop u from cutting it?
Anonymous: i cut on both
Heroin: i'm confused! AHHHHH -walks away with my head down
Anonymous: naw i just want some wrist tatts. dont leave. u know online u were the one person i let get inside my head so im my most dead honest wit u i have no reason to put up a front,u know that about me
Heroin: are u going to cut these tatts up after they heal or some crazy shit
Anonymous: gosh no; im not fuqkin up my tatts. da fuqk?
Heroin: you fucking up your wrist which is like some type of art to u, just to put art on top of the art you already created. and u want me to think you're not crazy. so what u gonna go to your arm next. until u put a tattoo there too?
Anonymous: naw no arm tattz
Heroin: u driven me in a loop
Anonymous: im a cutter. IM NOT EMO! and i dont cut myself every time someone tells me im useless, dumb, crazy. umm shyt like that. but i do take alot of shyt from ppl. for the last year i've been in a situation where ive been put down by someone im lovin just so she could pull me back up; and for the life of me i dont want to walk away from the situation. i take alot of shyt but i dont give. me cutting… its a way of coping.
Heroin: and u still put up with it
Anonymous: yea, because i feel like i need her
Heroin: so you'll just continue to cut to psychologically heal these emotions, these situations. because you rather cut then to be with out her
Anonymous: and she fusses wit me for cutting when she knows shes the reason. like this last episode she was like, “why u did that? U want me to fuqk u up?” like physically “beat the fuqk” out of me. Again! but thats another story
Heroin: whoa! she put her hands on u?
Anonymous: yea
Heroin: da hell?, really yo?
Anonymous: i rarely say this, or type this out loud. to anyone
Heroin: really? really... i mean really? that's how u allow shit to get down
Anonymous: but im in a mentally emotionally and physically abusive thing right now and im trying to find a way to get out, but i cant. i say i want to leave; move with my cuz, then she calls me cryin sayin she doesnt want me to leave
Heroin: i disapprove i'm really disappointed with you right now
Anonymous: yea; im disappointed wit myself, cuz i know im better than that i just didnt wanna admit that i let myself get into to that
Heroin: real talk. you need to stop settling for less. Any and everybody can tell you what you need to do for real but it's not going to change your mind or motivate you to do better for your self
Anonymous: see… its every one telling me i need to leave get away from her, but until im ready its pointless
Heroin: if you want to find happiness you need to first start with your self. and if you loved your self you wouldn't hurt your self by allowing your self to be hurt
Heroin: i mean exactly that's why i said any and every body could tell you w/e but it's up to you to put you first when it comes to your mental, physical, emotional health... all that starts with you
Anonymous: see… and the ppl that i need u know they're turnin they're back on me, and its like “all ur friends are leavin u, but u still got me”
Heroin: do you realize why they can't stay? Because they can't stand to see you keep doing this shit to your self; this girl got you wrapped up like that? i mean really though?
Anonymous: yea she does we "dont go together" but we've been in a situation since last feb
Heroin: it's that serious where you can't think clearly enough to make a self conscious decision for your own benefit
Anonymous: shes gotten pregnant on me, was sleeping wit a whole other female, using my whip to ride this chick around
Heroin: oh man, oh man i really need to smoke again. u got me on some shit.
Anonymous: had the white man she was fuqkin, the other chick she was fuqkin, and me all in her house
Heroin: i'm completely flabbergasted
Anonymous: chillin... and the sad part is, i still love her... so yea i am crazy
Heroin: and the fact that you know all this. You sat right in front of it. and she just so connivingly did all this shit to you right in front your face and you're sitting here like every thing is all copasetic got me totally fucked up. Are you sure you're black?
Anonymous: i respected the fact that she was honest with me from jump; everything that she told me everything i told u
Heroin: leave it right there; that's ok. Don’t say nothing else lol

So it's been about a half a year since i bloged and i think it's been holding me back from my creative side because i haven't had enough out lets. I'm way overdue for a blog; i feel like a noob.

Man let me tell you JADAKISS is that nigga. If you don't fuck with him you apparently a nigga i can't even relate too. Not on no mean snotty snooty type shit; just keeping it 100.

Random: I'm into niggas that have been through some things that allowed them to live two different life styles and have wide imaginations. I'm for all the action and danger and shit in my life. That gives me an adrenalin-rush; I'm just attracted to bad boys. Is it wrong? Not necessarily but it just may not be right for you! I'm not going to sit up here and say, "Man I want me a square ass always pleasing me type of dude." That would just be lien and I'm just not that type of girl. Nothing is wrong with a Square nigga i even have square friends but as far as relationship wise? Naw it just doesn't work out for me. I attract real Gangsta ass niggas. Not hood rat, ghetto ass, dumb,,dusty nigga’s; but real "G's." Does that mean that the dude with the 2/4 legal jobs, that always come home at the same time, always is nice and smiling and giddy and gullible just becomes the dead last for me? Yeah, and you want to know why? Because I like edgy; I like knowing that we've been through something and our love is strong enough to keep us together. I'm in love with the fact that i'm not looking forward to the same day; the fact that a dude can push me on or off at a mere second. That i allowed my feelings to open up to care that much about someone to the point I let them up-set me. I'm just speaking for my self here and as much as that might not make sense you can twist it up and screw it how ever u want. I'm saying everything is not always supposed to be perfect. The most imperfect dude is the perfect one for me. Do you get me? I know my mind is like crazy you're probably saying, "What planet did this silly bitch arrive off of." That's cool though because I'm not your typical ass women. I don't have the same typical ass beliefs. I don't believe in the best of the best with the white picket fence and all that bullshit. I believe in hard love. I like niggas that love hard. I love soft so i want someone who's the opposite of me to connect. Magnetic Love is the best kind ^_^. This is only part 1 of my Highthology 101.

dueces